favorite new site to abuse @ work[views:20947][posts:119]______________________________ [May 15,2009 3:31pm - Yeti ""] (314): So I went on a date with this girl...and whos our waitress? My girlfriend got a second job she didn't tell me about to afford my bday present. brutal. |
| _________________________________ [May 15,2009 3:38pm - oscarct ""] xanonymousx said:is the (#) the area code? yep |
| _________________________________ [May 15,2009 3:56pm - RustyPS ""] (770): Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex (404): Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut (770): Fuck. Wron person. But yea |
| _________________________________ [May 18,2009 3:10pm - RustyPS ""] (267): worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram ..........so sick |
| _____________________________________ [May 18,2009 3:22pm - Sacreligion ""] (949): either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating |
| ______________________________ [May 18,2009 3:25pm - Yeti ""] 469): Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them hahahahahaha |
| ______________________________________ [May 18,2009 4:22pm - the_reverend ""] (850): I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life. (1-850): Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say. |
| _________________________________ [May 18,2009 7:44pm - RustyPS ""] (404): I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period TFLN: effecting lives |
| ______________________________________ [May 18,2009 7:53pm - the_reverend ""] (209): yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room. |
| ______________________________________ [May 18,2009 7:54pm - the_reverend ""] (910): He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj (910): I think that's fair trade off |
| _________________________________ [May 18,2009 8:26pm - RustyPS ""] (770): cant believe you said you would bone perez hilton (1-770): i said paris hilton (770): thats even worse |
| _____________________________________ [May 19,2009 2:08pm - Melba_Toast ""] Reminds me of http://www.overheardinnewyork.com/ |
| ______________________________________ [May 20,2009 1:22am - the_reverend ""] (925): is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong? I met up with a little girl I babysat who became a stripper. that was weird. |
| __________________________________ [May 20,2009 10:35am - RustyPS ""] (407): So I just walked in on one of our neighbors having sex...on our couch. (352): WHAT?! (407): He apologized for staining our couch, then asked if he could make me a drink. Pretty sure he was still inside her while we were talking. |
| _______________________________________ [May 20,2009 10:42am - the_reverend ""] the sight hasn't been loading for me all morning. |
| ______________________________________ [May 21,2009 9:44am - the_reverend ""] (402): So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me. (1-402): Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it? (402): Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point. |
| _________________________________ [May 21,2009 3:57pm - RustyPS ""] (415): And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!" (1-415): What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy. (415): He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie." |
| ______________________________________ [May 25,2009 9:43pm - the_reverend ""] (734): i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle. (1-734): what was she crying about? (734): i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job. |
| ___________________________________________ [May 25,2009 9:57pm - HowToCatchShadows ""] (336): walked into a party last night, i saw 3 ex gfs standing in a circle talking to each other...that's the quickest u-turn i've ever made in my life. shit, that's totally happened to me |
| __________________________________ [May 26,2009 12:35pm - RustyPS ""] (757): he kept looking at my chin until i asked why, then he just said he was making sure his balls didnt leave a mark. |
| __________________________________ [May 26,2009 12:36pm - RustyPS ""] the hits just keep on coming: (210): i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it (312): Is it possible to jerk off a nipple? (937): I'll bet she douches with gravy. (303): erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on |
| ___________________________________ [May 26,2009 12:59pm - c.DEad" ""] "(443): My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT " Awesome. |
| _______________________________________ [May 28,2009 12:07pm - the_reverend ""] (978): so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo |
| ______________________________ [May 28,2009 1:00pm - Yeti ""] (403): found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun. |
| _________________________________ [May 28,2009 5:55pm - sxealex ""] the_reverend said:(978): so i slept on a park bench last night...no hobo lol was just about to paste this then looked up |
| ______________________________ [May 28,2009 7:39pm - Lamp ""] Yeti said:(919): so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog. hahahahahaha Hahahaha, this is the area code I live in now. |
| _________________________________________ [Jun 5,2009 4:44am - douchebag_patrol ""] (603): Last night was a blur. All I remember is jizzing in the squeegee bucket at a gas station. (1-603): The look on the soccer mom's face was PRICELESS. |
| _________________________________________ [Jun 5,2009 4:47am - douchebag_patrol ""] (978): i just used the Cadillac of toilet papers. For a minute i actually forgot i was even wiping my ass....i thought i was floating butt first into heaven |
| _________________________________________ [Jun 5,2009 4:49am - douchebag_patrol ""] (585): Maybe if i eat something filling like whole wheat pasta it will make me less hungry for things like dick |
| _________________________________ [Jun 5,2009 11:26am - RustyPS ""] (615): everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent |
| ________________________________ [Jun 5,2009 4:22pm - RustyPS ""] (315): I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob (203): For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho unbelievable |
| ________________________________ [Jun 5,2009 4:24pm - RustyPS ""] (505): My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut. WINNER |
| ______________________________ [Jun 8,2009 10:37am - Yeti ""] (614): You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat. |
| _________________________________ [Jun 9,2009 10:23am - RustyPS ""] (571): So I went home with some chick last night... I'm not sue what's worse: not getting a nut at 5am, the condom breaking and not being replaced, feeling poo when I put my finger in her but, sleeping on a heroin mattress in her living room, her swine flu coughing fit at 7am or realizing she peed the matt at 10am. Actually it was probably the fact that she continuously told me she was the classiest girl in boulder. |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 24,2009 9:22pm - the_reverend ""] (212): i feel like the prize bull at the rodeo. everybody got a ride, no one lasted more than 8 seconds and i'm pretty sure i kicked one of them in the ball sack |
| ______________________________________ [Jun 24,2009 9:24pm - the_reverend ""] (706): If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 13,2009 7:05pm - the_reverend ""] (303): i dont think my boyfriend knows how much of a pain it is to shave my ass |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 13,2009 7:08pm - the_reverend ""] (405): Add "its too hot" to reasons why I don't get fucked anymore |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 13,2009 7:12pm - the_reverend ""] (651): theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it (651): nevermind its newpaper |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 13,2009 7:18pm - the_reverend ""] (559): you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 13,2009 7:55pm - the_reverend ""] (501): I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay (602): I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay" |
| ______________________________________ [Jul 24,2009 1:46pm - the_reverend ""] (334): I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet. |
| _________________________________ [Aug 14,2009 3:46pm - oscarct ""] (585): broke, out of weed, out of gas, out of food, and my gf just left me. (716): you're writing country songs now? |
| _____________________________________ [Aug 15,2009 1:43pm - secthammer ""] (519): and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba" THE CIRCLE OF LIFE OR YOU'RE A FAGGOT |
| ______________________________________ [Aug 26,2009 3:54pm - the_reverend ""] (949): It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth |
| _____________________________________ [Aug 26,2009 4:06pm - The_Rooster ""] (905): just wanted to thank u for shitting in my dads bidet last night. i had to manually scoop ur shit out of it. btw ur dumped. |
| _____________________________________ [Aug 26,2009 4:08pm - The_Rooster ""] (256): I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip |
| _____________________________________ [Aug 26,2009 4:11pm - The_Rooster ""] (541): my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests HAHAHAHAHAHA |
| _____________________________________ [Aug 26,2009 4:28pm - The_Rooster ""] (941): Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits? (1-941): Wow! You need to get laid. This site is pure fucking gold. Pissing myself over here. |
| _____________________________________________ [Aug 26,2009 4:39pm - dontlivefastjustdie ""] (813): I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit." |