The "I just came really close to shitting my pants at work" thread...[views:8133][posts:22]_____________________________________ [Apr 17,2009 4:25pm - The_Rooster ""] Title says it all. There I was, standing at the urinal finishing off a nice "pee", when a bit of flatulence brewed up... Well... apparently there was more to it than just a little gas. Fortunately, it didn't breach the cheeks, and I was able to get to the bowl before I ruined my drawers (and my day). "Ummm, I need to go home early, because, ummm... well, I shit my pants." Not something you want to tell your boss. |
| __________________________________________________ [Apr 17,2009 4:32pm - Chuck Schuldiner‘s Butt ""] The smell of a masculine dump perks me up, because I know there's a randy cock nearby looking for random faggot ass, or maybe sentimental rockstar death metal? Call me. |
| __________________________________________ [Apr 17,2009 6:36pm - douchebag_patrol ""] [img] |
| __________________________________________________ [Apr 17,2009 7:02pm - Chuck Schuldiner‘s Butt ""] A fresh shart, well marbled with semen, is arousing... |
| _______________________________ [Jun 28,2011 10:45am - Yeti ""] almost faced a Fukushima style disaster. i found what i thought was a granola bar at my house, so i ate it. turns out it was a fiber bar. this has been an active morning. despite the firehole, i haven't felt this cleansed in a long time. |
| _______________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 10:49am - SLAAAAG NLI ""] I just downed two fiber bars myself. Hoping/bracing for total bowel purity. |
| ____________________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 10:49am - FuckIsMySignature ""] i sharted on the golf course the other day. halfway through WALKING 9 holes. ugh. |
| ____________________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 10:50am - FuckIsMySignature ""] Yeti said:almost faced a Fukushima style disaster. i found what i thought was a granola bar at my house, so i ate it. turns out it was a fiber bar. this has been an active morning. despite the firehole, i haven't felt this cleansed in a long time. FIBER FART BART FTW. |
| __________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 10:56am - Mark R ""] I have two Fiber Plus bars here. JUST IN CASE. |
| _______________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 11:33am - the_reverend ""] I went to this gym this morning. Good news, I'm that much hotter. Bad news, I guess going to the gym in the AM angers my bowels to waterfall status. |
| _______________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 11:33am - the_reverend ""] [img] |
| ___________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 11:59am - SLAAAAG ""] honestly, that was brutal. I wasn't sure I was going to be able to contain the forces in my bowels as I walked briskly to the toilet. |
| ______________________________ [Jun 28,2011 1:15pm - Yeti ""] FART BART |
| __________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 1:22pm - SLAAAAG ""] NEVER EAT TWO BARS AT A TIME |
| ______________________________ [Jun 28,2011 3:23pm - Yeti ""] i sat down to shit and ended up farting for 2 minutes straight. |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 5:00pm - largefreakatzero ""] Self-leveling mud, or gtfo. |
| ______________________________ [Jun 28,2011 5:20pm - Lamp ""] Yeti said:almost faced a Fukushima style disaster. i found what i thought was a granola bar at my house, so i ate it. turns out it was a fiber bar. this has been an active morning. despite the firehole, i haven't felt this cleansed in a long time. I had bought some fiber a while back and was taking it at least twice a day like the instructions said to on the jar. It was the kind you mix in a glass of water and drink. The first day this started working, I took four gigantic shits in the span of probably 3 hours. It was the best I've ever felt. |
| __________________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 5:22pm - largefreakatzero ""] The pill-form is easier. I take it every night and blast the bowl 1st thing in the morning. Great times. |
| ______________________________ [Jun 28,2011 5:24pm - Lamp ""] I was trying to take a multivitamin earlier this year and almost choked on it, now I seem to have some phobia of taking pills. |
| ______________________________ [Jun 28,2011 5:26pm - Yeti ""] the gas is overwhelming, but odor free. i think i'm going to start eating these more often, i feel awesome. |
| _______________________________________ [Jun 28,2011 5:51pm - SLAAAAGG NLI ""] Agreed. If bowels ain't happy, ain't nooooobody happy. |
| _____________________________________________________ [Oct 18,2013 2:24pm - grilled_dickcheese_sandwich ""] Had a close call and did the tin soldier routine all the way to the bathroom, all casual so no one suspects anything. |
| _____________________________________________________ [Oct 18,2013 2:41pm - grilled_dickcheese_sandwich ""] I just earned a gold medal in the diarrhea olympics. |