The truth and nothing but....[views:26281][posts:78]______________________________________________ [Aug 22,2015 7:13pm - AndrewBastard_4real ""] So this is long overdue but but here goes. As you all know, I went through a couple years of IV heroin and cocaine addiction. I tired it once, fell in love and it went downhill from there just like it does for everyone else that uses it and despite warnings from friends and loved ones that I was going to lose control, I kept using and did some awful shit to good people; people I care. I burned a lot of irreparable bridges... I live in Providence now and made the desicion to go to a show at Dusk tonight (Aug 22nd) and was fairly public about my attendance via Facebook. As a result, a few people that do still care about me, for whatever reason warned me not to go because people were gunning for me. I also got into it in a FB thread with Robin where I got mouthy and I suppose I regret that. My frustration stems from the fact that I'm being accused and therefore threatened for something I did not do: steal One Fund money. I'll start off by saying some of the shit I DID do and NEVER denied: I broke into the PanzerBastard practice space with a fire extinguisher (NOT to disguise it as a robbery...there are cameras in there...I simply didnt have a key and was a desperate junky). I then took Chris Gigueres Les Paul and pawned it because I had already pawned everything else I owned and in my diseased mind, that was the next step. The intention was to get enough dope to kill me but alas, it was not meant to be.... I owned up to taking his guitar THAT day to him and told him I'd get it back. I was in the throws of addiction and never managed to get it back for him at that time because I was arrested shortly there after for felony larceny...people that dont believe that, I dont know what to tell you but it's the truth. Anyway, that was my first stint in rehab...Oct 31st of 2013. I have since been to court with Chris over this matter, he got his guitar back and I paid retribution to the pawn shop. Whether he forgives me or not isn't the issue, I wasn't asking for forgiveness, I simply wanted to do the right thing. Now regarding the One Fund situation... I worked at a print shop as many of you may know so I printed 100 posters to sell at the event. These posters cost me $1 each to print, I sold them for like $3 or $4 at the show. I recouped MY $100 (and probably put that $100 into my arm just like I did with every other dollar I earned/stole)...I was also the one selling the shirts. Towards the end of the night, before the last 2 bands had even gone on, we barely had any shirts left and I was dopesick so I gave ALL the cash profits from the shirts AND the posters to two of the girls running the raffle next to me and took off to get my fix...with MY money. I dont know anything about mail order posters...I printed 100 posters and they all came to that show with me. No one should have paid me for one and not received one right there and then; I'm not sure where that rumor started. I lived with Mike Notshaver in JP at this time...I'm not pointing any fingers or saying he stole the money: I'm simply saying, I did NOT see or touch a dime of that money after that night. He did start giving me cash for H and coke on the DL every now and then and I never asked where that money came from but he had a job AND this was happening BEFORE the One Fund show so...I dunno. I was not "in the know" about all this, there was no scheme hatched between him and I...if that money was in his possession and it's never been accounted for, thats on HIM, not me. I was working while living in JP with Mike and giving him $400 every month for the 6+ months I lived there...right around the end of all this BS, I got an email from our landlord saying he hadn't received a red cent in rent money from me OR Mike in months. I assumed rent was being paid when I gave Mike my cash every month but apparently it wasn't. I never met or saw the landlord, the only reason he emailed me is because Mike wouldnt respond to him, I guess. He had my email addy from when I emailed him a scan of the signed lease when I moved in. The dude lived in NYC in case any of you are wondering why he didnt just come to the house. I even stole cash from a roommate I lived with in Arlington that I barely knew after Serge gave me the benefit of the doubt and let e come live with him. Talk about a kid with a huge heart, who tried to help me over and over and over and I just spit in his face. Lying to, hurting and betraying a friend that magnitude is soul crushing, let me tell you. Regarding Codex Obscurum...it's a pretty bad idea to start something like that when you're a junky but it does need to be said that I didnt start that zine for dope money...in fact I did a SHITLOAD of work for that zine while I was involved and I'd say 90% of the people got their zines...towards the end of my participation with it, things got really shitty and destitute on my end; some people paid and never got their zines and some of the people who worked on the zine with me sent me $$ to have CO shirts made up which never got made and they never got their money back. Thats fucking shitty and I hate that I did that. I hate that ANY of this shit went down, but heroin is a hellovadrug. Those people I owe money to will get it back in time. I've been struggling with this addiction ever since all this BS up until about 4 months ago (been clean the past 4 months)...I'm STILL struggling with it...I always will be but now I'm actually getting my shit together, moving past all this guilt, depression, regret etc and trying to make some amends to the people I stole from and the people I hurt, betrayed, manipulated and lied to. That drug ruled my life. I abandoned every value, virtue and shred of integrity I've ever had to get unsick and it eats me up inside everyday. Friends, family, loved ones etc... I wallow in guilt every morning when I wake up and every night when I put my head on my pillow and try to fall asleep. I cant change the past, I can only hope to be a better person today, and tomorrow and the day after that. I needed to get this all off my chest before I got jumped over something I didn't do. There are some people I burned that have every right to hate me and never forgive me, but the One Fund Witch Hunters are not among those people. I have a clean conscience in regards to that situation. So there you have it in a nutshell. Every word of this is Goats Honest Truth Sincerely, Andrew, the huge pussy not going to the show in providence tonight because he just got out of the ACI and cant risk getting arrested and doing the 3 year bid hanging over his head and who doesnt want to get beat up by 50 people over something he didn't do because getting beat up sucks. this is probably just turn into your classic RTTP anon troll thread, but at least its out there for the world to see. |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 22,2015 7:48pm - Czarnobog ""] Chris wasn't the only one you ripped off at the space, I had some pedals walk away too. Also, when you were living with Mike the kids who lived downstairs told me a bunch've their gear was stolen out of the basement. They asked me if I thought anyone in your apartment could've taken it and I said no, because you all went by musician code. At the time I didn't know what a shitbag you had become. I can't prove or disprove you had any direct part in Mike's theft, but it has come back to me that you knew full well he took the money and agreed to keep quiet about it. Tacit support. Plus the poster scam you were running via Victoria's Paypal after the fact. Bottom line: Fuck your fake ass apology, gear thieves are not welcome at any show I am apart of. Don't bother showing up tonight. I'll be working the door and you aren't getting in. |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 22,2015 8:34pm - AB4real ""] I did take some pedals and i think some old cymbals that were lying around from the practice space...i also took that shit from the JP basement. I stole and pawned any and everything that wasnt nailed down during this period. In time I'd be happy to reimburse those people...i only ask for time because getting a job with 2 felony larceny charges from your places of former employment is tough. I didn't mention this stuff, particularly the JP basement stuff because it doesn't pertain to RTTP people. Maybe you wanted an entire rundown of everything i stole over this period to get high? That would take all night. Regarding mail order posters...I truly have no recollection of this; if those people that claim they bought posters thru paypal can provide a receipt, id be happy to refund them too. I ask for receipts because i know i def didn't send any posters out so they absolutely deserve refunds. I dont have access to the email account or the pp account otherwise i'd look them up myself. I didn't have a bank account, Victoria did so i used hers to set the account up. She wasn't involved in any way. There was no 'poster scheme'... This isn't a fake apology...you're welcome to disbelieve me and hate me forever more. I'm simply owning up to my shit. |
| _________________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 12:52am - Angelo Pappas ""] Utah! Get me two! |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 3:24am - Czarnobog ""] AB4real said:I did take some pedals and i think some old cymbals that were lying around from the practice space...i also took that shit from the JP basement. I stole and pawned any and everything that wasnt nailed down during this period. In time I'd be happy to reimburse those people...i only ask for time because getting a job with 2 felony larceny charges from your places of former employment is tough. I didn't mention this stuff, particularly the JP basement stuff because it doesn't pertain to RTTP people. Maybe you wanted an entire rundown of everything i stole over this period to get high? That would take all night. Regarding mail order posters...I truly have no recollection of this; if those people that claim they bought posters thru paypal can provide a receipt, id be happy to refund them too. I ask for receipts because i know i def didn't send any posters out so they absolutely deserve refunds. I dont have access to the email account or the pp account otherwise i'd look them up myself. I didn't have a bank account, Victoria did so i used hers to set the account up. She wasn't involved in any way. There was no 'poster scheme'... This isn't a fake apology...you're welcome to disbelieve me and hate me forever more. I'm simply owning up to my shit. So... what? What's the discussion? Pay everyone you ripped off back in full or go fuck yourself. End of story. Alternative: disappear... move away, slit your wrists, whatever. I don't give a fuck. Just don't think you can come around like everything's cool because now your clean. |
| _______________________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 11:43am - AndrewBastard_4real ""] Czarnobog said: Pay everyone you ripped off back in full or go fuck yourself. End of story. well, yeah...that is the plan, I feel like I made that abundantly clear already. Just know that I'm doing this for ME and for the people within the Boston scene that I care about and whos friendships I valued...you, sir are not on that list; you're not even a fucking blip on my radar, so I'll kick you the cash for the stuff i inadvertently stole from you, offer my sincere apologies (and I mean that) and then I'll go on living my life as though you don't exist just like I have for the past 33 years of my life, and you can do the same....k? k. |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 12:31pm - Czarnobog ""] Works for me. If you ever want to pay me for the shit you stole from me, cool. Not holding my breath. Either way, you're still not welcome at any shows I am involved with. I have a responsibility to the bands we host to keep their gear secure, and the venues we work with to not have tips disappear from the bar or random shit turn up missing. I'm not letting a known thief come around. |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 12:51pm - Czarnobog ""] AndrewBastard_4real said:I'm doing this for ME and for the people within the Boston scene that I care about ^ and this is exactly why your apologies are fake. You have no sincerity or genuine sense of remorse, its just self-entitled and self-serving bullshit. It's disgusting. |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 1:37pm - AB4real ""] Sure I do, I sincerely feel awful about the shit I've done and I want to right those wrongs to both the people i genuinely care about AND those outsiders I wronged in the wake. My point is, although I dont expect forgiveness, there are a few people out there I hope can at least accept the apology and let it be. the people i care about that is. I'll make right with the people i did wrong to because it's the right thing to do and because i need to be rid of the guilt... I'm NOT doing it so that Mark Laskey likes me again. Make any sense? |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 1:40pm - AB4real ""] Regarding your shows: fair enough, i understand and respect that. I brought that on myself. Perhaps in time I'll have proved myself to be the person i was before all of this and you'll have a change of heart but i, too will not hold my breath. |
| ______________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 3:34pm - Garth Algar ""] Fucking junkies, man. I'll just do whatever I want to whomever I fucking want, then when I'm done, I'll say sorry. Fuck off, dip shit |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 3:36pm - That's cute ""] AB4real said:Perhaps in time I'll have proved myself to be the person i was before all of this. Before "all this" you were caught embezzling at your job at Guitar Center in, what? 2005? That, and sleeping with Pagan Megan while she was still dating Braunschweiger, all the while being buddy-buddy to the kid's face. You've never had a shred of dignity or honor and your desire to live guilt-free is laughable, at best. Fuck off. |
| ________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 3:38pm - KEVORD ""] I don't know if this really Andrew but since he stuck me with a ton of orders for zines that he never sent out but kept the money, stole the money that was supposed to go toward Codex tshirts, and never gave me money like he said he would when I let him and his GF stay in my room at MDF two years ago he can go fuck himself. I don't want him at any show at Ralph's that I have anything to do with. Sorry if I can't take your 4 months of sobriety seriously if you are already going to bars. |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 4:34pm - AB4real ""] I wont dignify some of these anonymous remarks with a response... And Kevin, I acknowledged the Codex situation up there ^^ I'm sorry about all that shit. It's not how I wanted any of that shit to go down, but I also dont remember asking you to takeover a zine I started and/or pay for MY fuckups...i respect that you did and i'm happy to see it still going strong. I'll shoot over some cash via PP when I can. Our personal relationship means fuck all to me so I'm not gonna sweat that aspect. I can only say sorry so many times, so I'll leave it at that. Maybe once that cash arrives you'll think better of me, if not..so be it. |
| ______________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 6:18pm - That‘s cute ""] AB4real said:I wont dignify some of these anonymous remarks with a response... Right. Because: A. You have no dignity And B. These remarks are true and don't help the case you're trying to make for yourself. You're in no position to coping an attitude to anyone, former friends or otherwise. To say "you're not a blip on my radar" to anyone only reinforces any proof that your Napoleon complex hasn't waned during your time as a social outcast. So enjoy life in perpetual exile, you socialite party twerp, we certainly don't miss you or your excruciatingly mediocre "art." |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 7:28pm - AB4real ""] Ok, Matt. I'll work on getting my "art" up to your standards. Because your stamp of approval means everything to me. Everything. I guess I'm done here. I've said my piece. Actions speak louder than words and I have every intention of paying my debts with no expectations of forgiveness from anyone. Doing this will make me feel better about myself moving with my life and if I can mend some of my valued relationships in the process, great. If not, I'll accept that and move on. YOLO. Kevin, Mark, I'll be in touch via other means when its financially viable. |
| _________________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 8:04pm - Basement Satan ""] [img] |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 8:52pm - Not Fake ""] Some real shit |
| _____________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 9:49pm - Arilliusbm ""] All the best, Andrew. I've known you for a while, don't plan on holding any grudges. |
| _________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 11:15pm - xmikex ""] While we're making a list of reparations I'll take the $25 I gave you for Codex shirts that got re-invested in my honor....I don't have a receipt. I didn't know you especially well, but I always enjoyed our interactions. So I have no perspective to share on anything else. Just don't use Tori's PayPal when you do/don't ever send the money back. Rumor has it she's not the accounting savant we all thought she was. |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 11:31pm - AB4real ""] Appreciate that, Jim. A lot of people have expressed support for me on the DL so props for having the balls to do it publicly. Mike, I'm making a list and checking it twice. You've been added to it. Who would have guessed a strung out Italian chick couldn't handle the finances? I'll hire a jew next time. But in all honesty, this was all me...it was just in her name because she had a bank account and i didn't. She never would have done heroin if it weren't for me either so chalk that one up on my list of really awesome human being accomplishments. I'm making big life changes...this is just the beginning. |
| _________________________________________________________ [Aug 23,2015 11:54pm - Whichever way the Jawsh blows ""] What a junkie and oah nice guy |
| ___________________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 12:30am - Kinslayer's Big Adventure ""] bennyhillifier |
| ___________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 7:36am - Here's the Truth ""] The honest truth is that everyone that posted in this thread is a faggot. |
| _______________________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 8:43am - RTTP DEPARTMENT OF REBUTTALS ""] But |
| _________________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 9:37am - King Thündērstøol ""] KILL THAT IDIOT THUNDERSTEEL AND YOU WILL BE FORGIVEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! |
| ______________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 10:02am - Arilliusbm ""] Andrew, lemme clarify my stance. I've known you for what, 13 years or something? We were always acquaintances, hung out every so often back in the day. But I didn't see much of you when you moved to Boston. I didn't see firsthand all the addiction and drug-related shit you were doing. I only really heard about it. What you did was NOT cool and you burned all the bridges you had, like you said above. From my perspective, none of this had to do with me, so I naturally don't want to get involved. Am I mad at what you did to some of my friends, etc? Yes. But for me personally, you only really owe me 20 bucks for the t-shirts. I'm over that. Let's face it, drugs bring out the worst in people. Some of the shit you did was inexcusable, though under the circumstances it probably seemed reasonable to you at the time. But I'm not going to sit here and pat you on the back. I'm over the fact that you owe me 20 bucks. Everything else is really none of my business. I hope you crawl out of your hole you dug, but I'm not gonna be there to drag you out of it. So in closing, good to see you are back, but you're going to get hit hard with the reality of everything you had did to your friends over the last few years.. They have every right to speak their mind on it.. Tootles. |
| _________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 10:34am - AndrewFagtard ""] Hi gays, sorry for my actions. Does anyone have drugz? |
| ________________________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 10:55am - Sorry I sucked dick for coke ""] bennyhillifier |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 11:31am - Wild Man ""] King%20Thündērstøol said:KILL THAT IDIOT THUNDERSTEEL AND YOU WILL BE FORGIVEN!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Look at this guy wiggin out. |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 11:35am - AB4real ""] I'll add your $20 to the list, J-wow. |
| _____________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 11:55am - ARIL IS A FAGGOT ""] seriously, guy sides with andrew after all the shit he did to us. What a Fucking faggot, I hope someone beats him up. |
| _________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 2:05pm - NH Brufaggotry ""] AndrewBastard owes me $18! |
| _________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 2:13pm - NH Brufaggotry ""] GIVE ME THE $18 OR I WILL HAVE MEGATRON BLOW YOUR FUCKING HEAD OFF!!! |
| ________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 2:20pm - Optimus Crime ""] NH%20Brufaggotry said:GIVE ME THE $18 OR I WILL HAVE MEGATRON BLOW YOUR FUCKING HEAD OFF!!! Don't you have guitar lessons to teach at the midtown mall needle basement? |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 5:10pm - Wild Man ""] Look at this guy wiggin' out. |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 6:47pm - the truth ""] wah wah wah you all sound like a bunch of girls..so he stole some gear and fucking poster shit. he didn't murder or rape anyone...just pay em back with $$$ and get over it stupid boston scenester fags... |
| ___________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 7:31pm - Oh Snap! ""] Krazy Ezra Hamblet for the win! King Of Cherry St,-Brook & still undisputed! |
| __________________________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 8:15pm - When bae horny but the squad... ""] the%20truth said:wah wah wah you all sound like a bunch of girls..so he stole some gear and fucking poster shit. he didn't murder or rape anyone...just pay em back with $$$ and get over it stupid boston scenester fags... You're a fucking homo, Josh. |
| __________________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 11:24pm - Sir Elton John ""] Goodbye Short Hair Jawsh Though I never knew you at all You had the grace to hold yourself While those around you crawled They crawled out of the woodwork And they whispered into your brain They set you on the crockpot And they made you change your mane And it seems to me you lived your life Like a Staples in the wind Never knowing how to tryhard When the rain set in And I would have liked to have known you But I was just a kid Your bootleg tapes burned out long before Your legend ever did |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 24,2015 11:57pm - Outsiders ""] AB4real said:AND those outsiders I wronged in the wake. Hey Yo Junkie Bastard, you want to call out the real bad guy? if I was you I would watch what I say, you wronged a lot of people and you call me and the big guy out? What real person makes an apology online and not to the wronged people privately like men? Dogs with fleas stay down. |
| _________________________________________________________________________ [Aug 25,2015 12:45am - GrindrodBeatingAndrewLikeHeBeatsHisGirlfriend ""] GET 'ER A BODY BAG! YEAHHHH!!! [img] |
| __________________________________________ [Aug 25,2015 12:58am - Sir Elton John ""] I remember when rock was young Me and Notshaver had so much fun stealing pedals and skimming funds Had an Indian witch and a place of our own But the biggest kick we ever got was doing a thing called booting rock While the other kids were Rocking Round the Clock we were hopping and bopping to the Krokodil Rock Well Krokodil Rocking is something shocking when your feet just can't keep still I never knew me a better time and I guess I never will Oh Lawdy mama those Friday nights when Mikey wore his dresses tight and the Krokodil Rocking was out of sight Oooooooone-wa-wa-wa-wa-wa One Fund But the years went by and the rock just died Mikey went and left us for some florist guy Long nights crying by the record machine dreaming of my Chevy and my old squaw chief But they'll never kill the thrills we've got booting up with the Krokodil Rock Learning fast as the weeks went past we really thought the Krokodil Rock would last |
| _______________________________________________________ [Aug 25,2015 12:28pm - grilled dickcheese sandwich ""] Go suck a dick for heroin you junkie fagget! |
| __________________________________________ [Aug 25,2015 12:52pm - legit question ""] Which one? There are so many junkie faggets in this thread I can't keep track. |
| ______________________________ [Aug 25,2015 3:07pm - Yeti ""] I don't know the truth, I had no part so I have no say, but that was one of the most ego-bloated and least sincere attempts at an apology I've ever seen. You were better off not saying anything. |
| ______________________________ [Aug 25,2015 3:08pm - Yeti ""] It reads like a fucking movie script. |
| ____________________________________ [Aug 25,2015 3:40pm - Alx_Casket ""] Yeti said:It reads like a fucking black metal apology letter. |
| ________________________________________ [Aug 25,2015 3:41pm - Junky Shitbag ""] Where is Gemini? I need some brown!!! |
| ______________________________________________________ [Aug 25,2015 3:45pm - grilled dickcheese sandwich ""] legit%20question said:Which one? There are so many junkie faggets in this thread I can't keep track. Andrew. He can go hang out with King Faggetstool and suck cocks for heroin! |