*** REPORT FLATULENCE HERE ***[views:13165][posts:100]______________________________________ [Sep 13,2008 4:57pm - the_reverend ""] the elephant never forgets |
| _______________________________ [Oct 14,2008 9:51am - aril ""] Tuesday, 8:42 AM. Riding on the upper section of the Commuter Rail, I decided to let a nice warm one go. Its stench was overwhelmingly enjoyable on my part; I don't think many others enjoyed it. The smell was green chilis mixed with onion rings from the night before. Commuter next to me got up and moved to another train car. sound factor - 1/5 (silent) smell factor - 4/5 (didn't last long enough) joy factor - 5/5(reminded me that I am the king of farting on the commuter rail in the morning... at least on my train) |
| ____________________________________ [Oct 14,2008 10:14am - starmummy ""] I just beefed. |
| _______________________________ [Oct 14,2008 10:35am - Yeti ""] farting at concerts is awesome. you know you are grossing out at least 10 people. |
| _______________________________ [Oct 14,2008 10:35am - Yeti ""] though i could have farted at the ICP show and it would have made the Palladium smell better. |
| __________________________________________ [Oct 14,2008 10:53am - Conservationist ""] When I have the really bad farts, I stop by a local church and "read pamphlets" for about ten minutes, emitting all the while. I like how even the farts conspire toward silence... |
| ____________________________________ [Oct 14,2008 11:01am - starmummy ""] I just gassed. |
| ___________________________________ [Oct 14,2008 11:27am - cav nli ""] [Oct 14,2008 10:35am - Yeti] farting at concerts is awesome. you know you are grossing out at least 10 people. amen |
| ________________________________ [Oct 14,2008 11:31am - slymo ""] After i got home from watain i got into my bed where i ripped the ripped the worst ripper on my girlfriend then i laughed so hard about it that i verped (burp/vomiy) and all this wi-fi pizza came up with it... so gross |
| _________________________________________ [Oct 14,2008 2:03pm - Conservationist ""] I've got to eat my peanut butter/cabbage/chick pea curry, and then I'll report back with something impressive. |
| ___________________________________ [Oct 14,2008 2:18pm - starmummy ""] I just cut the cheese. |
| ______________________________ [Oct 14,2008 3:18pm - Yeti ""] "I've never heard a girl blow ass before!" |
| _______________________________ [Oct 20,2008 6:11pm - aril ""] Monday, 6:09 PM. Thinking I was alone in the office, I decided to let one go to ease the pressure. After a few seconds of thinking I was indeed alone, I soon realized that the cleaning lady was on the other side of my cube, and heard my massive explosion. She reluctantly walks by me and gives me a little glare, and skips my emptying my trash barrel. Mission accomplished. |
| _______________________________ [Oct 20,2008 6:13pm - aril ""] sound factor - 4/5 (massive flutter at the end) smell factor - 2/5 (i've had better ones) joy factor - 4/5 (scaring away the cleaning lady was a joy) |
| _______________________________ [Jan 22,2009 10:40am - Yeti ""] my colon has been extremely active today. i drank about 9 PBR's before going to bed last night, and i think i've farted out my body weight. they are those long, extremely relieving farts. i kept making my cat jump this morning when i was laying in bed waiting to get up. |
| _______________________________________ [Jan 22,2009 10:43am - the_reverend ""] I pufft out some things yesterday that stuck in my chair. when ever I moved, the smell of rotting vegetables creeped out of my chair. |
| _______________________________ [Jan 22,2009 10:46am - Yeti ""] i farted 4 times since posting. |
| _________________________________________ [Jan 23,2009 4:30pm - Conservationist ""] TurkBack said:This is relevant to my interests. It's... um... out of control. |
| _________________________________________ [Jan 23,2009 4:31pm - Conservationist ""] the_reverend said:I pufft Best euphemism ever. |
| ______________________________ [Oct 29,2009 1:14pm - Yeti ""] epic gas today. by the time the day is over the Earth's mean temperature will have gone up from me farting. |
| ___________________________________ [Oct 29,2009 1:32pm - dreadkill ""] my toilets are fucked up, so i took a shit in a bag last night. |
| ______________________________________ [Oct 29,2009 1:41pm - SkinSandwich ""] dreadkill said:my toilets are fucked up, so i took a shit in a bag last night. HAHA! |
| _____________________________________________ [Oct 29,2009 1:53pm - dontlivefastjustdie ""] the other night i ate 2 huge burritos before bed comprised of chopped up spicy black bean burgers, refried beans, jalpenos, cheddar cheese, and slathered in sriracha. I then ate taco bell the next day for lunch and bourbon chicken, lo mein noodles, and plantanes for dinner. the next day after that i shit out a planet |
| ______________________________________ [Oct 29,2009 1:55pm - the_reverend ""] OMG... I thought it was the cat last night. nope, it was one that was stuck in my shorts. |
| __________________________________ [Oct 29,2009 2:58pm - brian_dc ""] I'm currently having a fart party. A "farty" if you will. |
| ______________________________ [Oct 29,2009 3:16pm - Yeti ""] ha! a fucking + for that one. |
| ___________________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 9:47am - FuckIsMySignature ""] my gas is consistent |
| __________________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 11:27am - Conservationist ""] Two nights ago, I flopped over onto my stomach and emitted the longest continuous stream of flatulence -- of my life! I then woke myself up laughing. |
| _______________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 11:44am - SkinSandwich ""] Farting, the oldest, but never gets old laughing experience of all human time. |
| ____________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 11:49am - dreadkill ""] the other night, i farted and it scared my daughter while she was asleep. |
| ____________________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 11:50am - FuckIsMySignature ""] ITT: child abuse |
| ____________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 12:19pm - dreadkill ""] FuckIsMySignature said:ITT: child abusemy farts have probably taken years off my poor little girl's life. |
| _________________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 2:40pm - Conservationist ""] I farted in a humid outdoor elevator once, and when I came back the next day, it or something that smelled like it was still detectable. |
| ___________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 3:49pm - dreadkill ""] i fart in the elevator at work all the time. |
| ___________________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 3:52pm - FuckIsMySignature ""] i fart at the girl who works behind me all time. i consider them spite farts. |
| ___________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 3:55pm - dreadkill ""] a couple weeks ago, i was farting at my desk near the end of the day. the farts were audible but i didn't care. |
| _________________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 6:32pm - Conservationist ""] Green-tan cumulus clouds floating behind my chair... glad the day is almost over. |
| __________________________________ [Oct 30,2009 8:34pm - corpus_ ""] this morning: 1 tblspoon of chlorella in 0z of water. 2 cups of astragalus / licorice tea lunch: garbanzos, cranberries, lima beans, and kidney beans. afternoon / dinner: nothing; a couple pipes of kush. post dinner / ride hom from work: 40 oz'er of BL i enjoyed the ride home. rolled up the windows and light up another salubrious pipe. ..STENCH OF THE DECEASED! |
| _______________________________ [Oct 30,2009 8:52pm - timma ""] No one ever comes in to my cube at work, but of course, everytime I dropped a fresh anal blast some comes moseying on over... |
| _____________________________________ [Nov 2,2009 9:01pm - PANT3RA4EVA ""] Like to share my auto evisceration consisting of a ribbed octopuslike tentacle that shot straight down like a rocket ship on a tragectory to the cesspool of hell, having enough explosive force to lift me off the seat. The sudden gastral vacuum gave me a 64 second delay vomit-belch with an aromatic rotten mushy peanut surprise for my tongue that had not been completely swallowed from lunch the day before. The aroma was like reliving the last day's banquet, except that it had pressure cooked and pasteurized for 17.2 hours, prompting another wave of nausea after I was finally able to quaff the re-rechewed peanut and bile-spiked saliva. |
| _____________________________ [Nov 2,2009 9:19pm - Lamp ""] I farted a bunch of times today and they all overpowered the air with the stench of rotten milk. |
| ______________________________ [Nov 2,2009 9:46pm - tylor ""] [img] |
| ____________________________________________ [Nov 3,2009 8:06am - dontlivefastjustdie ""] brian_dc said:I'm currently having a fart party. A "farty" if you will. better than a "sharty" |
| _____________________________ [Nov 3,2009 8:11am - Yeti ""] i can't lie, a sharty sounds like a blast. *cough* |
| _____________________________________ [Nov 4,2009 7:30pm - PANT3RA4EVA ""] I forgot the word for when you wanna cut one but theres a pinch of solid and mushy expelled with the hot gases. |
| _____________________________________ [Nov 4,2009 8:30pm - SkinSandwich ""] PANT3RA4EVA said:I forgot the word for when you wanna cut one but theres a pinch of solid and mushy expelled with the hot gases. A quiver sliver! |
| ______________________________________ [Nov 4,2009 11:23pm - PANT3RA4EVA ""] I can fly widdat. Fo shizz |
| ________________________________________ [Nov 5,2009 7:11am - Conservationist ""] I love it when you're in a quiet store, like a grocery or hardware, and you hear someone an aisle or two over rip a long contorted fart that ends with a hard, wet, mucosal stop. |
| _________________________________________________ [May 11,2011 2:46pm - stench like six demons ""] i love ripping horrible stinky farts at the urinal when the bathroom at work is empty, then when i get to the sink to wash hands some poor fool walks in and goes straight to the urinal i just left a gas cloud at. |
| ______________________________________ [May 11,2011 3:59pm - SLAAAGG NLI ""] My new vegetable and fiber laden diet has made for some epic gas. |